What racing doesn't mean to me.

First of all, I know this is supposed to be a Homesteading blog, but I am lucky enough to have a lot of hobbies and interests. Racing is two of them. Both Half Marathons, and in this posts focus, Obstacle Course Racing.

I'm up at 5:20 in the morning starting this. If already been up for an hour because I went to bed earlier than usual and am now stuck in dark quiet solitude staring at my phone.

This post has been milling around in my head for some time and I've finally decided to talk about it. Well, I ran out of time really. Because in exactly 4 hours I'll be lined up with tons of friends and family getting ready to head out and conquor the Savage Race course. We will run up and down Ohio's version of a Ski resort multiple times, launch ourselves through tons of harrowing obstacles, join in true warrior communion around the water stations together, turn around and offer a mud dripping hand to help a friend rise and conquer a wall, or ditch, or some other obstacle. Many people will run in groups encouraging each other along because to them and so many more Obstacle Course Racing (OCR) is about the experience. It's about the grit. OCR is about not quitting. It's about tapping into our primal roots in a Wall-E world of modernization and comfort. OCR is this beautiful beast where you are on the course with people who are both at their peak of physical ability, and people who are at the bottom of a long climb towards a healthy lifestyle.

Those folks at the peak of their abity are fun to watch video clips of, and it's neat to read articles about Jon Albon running straight up a mountain at a breakneck speed of 5 min miles while dancing his way through obstacles making it look like he never touched them. Those folks are not why I race. Becoming that is not why I race. Becoming elite is not why I race.
I'm writing this mere hours before running Savage race for a simple reason. Last year, I qualified to attend and compete in the Obstacle Course Racing World Championship at Savage race. I specify attend because it was an amazing event. Something I wish everyone in the OCR community could attend. But that's the thing. In this up and coming sport of community, brotherhood and family, we have already found a way to create exclusivity.

Let me habe a quick side track. Anyone who knows me well knows that I hate exclusivity. I've hated the idea of fraternities and sororities for as long as I can remember. I think things like that are a drain on society, create inner circles that make it much harder for people in poverty situations to socially and economically bring themselves up and for a myriad of other reasons. I hate exclusivity. Everything is better with friends to me.

The more the merrier.

I really want to go race in the Obstacle Course Racing World Championships again. The snag is, it's exclusive. Annoyingly and frustratingly exclusive. O sure, there's a Journeyman category for people who "tried hard to qualify" and can show that they participated in 4 or more races this season. And those waves get to start at 4 o'clock in the afternoon, almost guaranteeing they get to finish in the dark, and get to enjoy the * next to their medal. It isn't a real one, but you can feel it. The stigma is there. Everyone wants to say they made it because they qualified. I did to.

I want to qualify. 50 percent of me knows I will, and 50 percent of me is filled with fear, dread, anger, self-loathing and a gut wrenching feeling that I'm going to spend the rest of the season making excuses to my very fit friends and family as to why I'm not going to Canada this year. (It makes me want to scream about how we had a baby and I have an excuse, but that's the point. It's an excuse and I know it)

I'm writing this the morning before I try to qualify because I don't want to write it after I haven't succeeded and sound like the whiney kid who didn't get his way. If I qualify this year, awesome. If I don't, no big deal. Because exclusivity isn't why I run.

Here's the dirty secret. Despite getting to attend such an awesome event last year, bringing home 3 sweet finishers medals, a ton of mud and some muscle sorness that lasted a month, it didn't feel like home.

Home is where the heart is, and my heart for the sport is with the guys looking up the ladder at the long climb towards health. My heart is with Warrior Dash, the local start up races like Black Swamp Dash and Indian Mud Run, and the programs like Spartan, Tough Mudder, and Savage that send out emails chock full of helpful tips, recipes, and workouts to help you on the journey to health and fitness. These races are saving lives.

I have 3 races coming up in the next month that are qualifiers for OCRWC. And I'm specifically writing this before I attempt any of them because I want to go into these races fueled with the spirit of the guys looking up the ladder. I've been on my own fitness journey for years now and I'm more comfortable and happier reaching down that ladder and offering a hand than I am trying to claw my way to it's peak. These next 3 races will be the last times I worry about qualifying. Ever.  Whether I do or do not, next season my focus will be offering a hand to those below me. I miss the Tough Mudder comraderie. The worry and fear of not being in the exclusive club isn't the fun part. Watching someone who crosses the finish line who fought every inch of the way not to quit, that's where the joy in racing is for me.

OCR is literally saving lives. It is literally creating a lifestyle for people that will allow them to watch their children grow old, and their grandchildren grow up and change the world. In just a few short years I'll be able to hit the course with 3 generations. That's incredible! This country is dying one drive-thru line at a time, and OCR is fighting back to save us. That's what I want to be a part of. I want to leave a mark and be inspiring for the people who's lives will be saved because of OCR. 

I miss the comraderi on the course.

Exclusivity has no room for me.

My heart is with OCR, and the folks at the bottom of the ladder. Let's climb together.